Lost and Insecure
by KitCatgirl4ever
Summary: bella is lost in her town. now that her parents and beloved brother Jacob are dead -yes i know hes not her bro but in this story he is- she doesnt know what to do but then edward comes along and shows her how loved she really is.
1. Chapter 1

It annoyed me how everyone was starring at me and they weren't even trying to hide it. They just kept starring. It has been a week since I had been at school. Although I did have an excuse; my arm was in a cast and my parents and twin brother were dead. Long story short there was a car accident a week ago and my mum brother dad and I were in a car on the way to dinner and a truck hit us. The three of them died on impact and all I got was a few stitches and a broken arm.  
My parents were wealthy and they have a very big house. I managed to convince the judge to let me live on my own in their house as opposed to foster care. I was 16 I could look after myself, plus the maid and the cook promised me that they would helpf me if I needed it.  
I walked into my English class and sat in my seat at the back of the room. I was a straight A student and I didn't really have friends. Since all the girls used me to get to my brother and all the guys were my brother's friends. So in a way the only friend I had was Jacob my twin brother… but now he was gone.  
No one talked to me in class and I was glad because I didn't know what I would say to them I was still in shock. After English I went to math and everyone just starred and whispered but I tried to block it out. I put my brothers black hoodie up over my head and tried to hide. I was an attractive girl I just didn't dress to impress. Math went by slowly and then I went to lunch. It wasn't until then that the fact that Jacob wasn't with me anymore finally hit me… Jacob used to sit with me outside every second day and with his friends every other day. I put my books in my locker and the tears started… I quickly walked outside and sat under the tree I normally sat under… It was then that I let the tears take over… I put my head on my knees and just let myself sob… I didn't even notice that someone was there… I looked up and saw…  
I saw a group of people standing around me. I looked at all the faces and then realized that it was the entire football team… my brothers entire footy team… they all sat down and I looked at them confused…  
"what are you all doing here" I said not looking at them.  
"We are here to support you Bella" Edward the now new captain said. Edward was my

brother's best friend he was a typical jock with the perfect body.  
The rest of the team nodded in agreement. It wasn't until then that I realized that some of the girl friends of the football team were there too.  
There was Jessica she was the cheer captain and dating quarter back Jason. I always thought she was nice she wasn't one of those skanky cheer captains. Then there was Angela she was dating Mitch and both Jessica and Angela had been with their boyfriends since year 8.  
I was so much in shock that I didn't know what to say. Edward was in all my classes and I didn't even think he knew I existed.  
I thought to myself I guess they miss Jacob as well…  
Everyone was talking amongst themselves when both Angela and Jessica walked up and sat beside me.  
Angela looked at me and spoke. "Bella we want to help you through this. Your brother loved you and we all loved him so this is the least we can do."  
I looked at her and then my face turned stern

"So what you are just all doing this because you feel guilty?!" I knew I was over reacting but I got up and walked away… The tears came back. I kept walking; I was going to the gate I needed to leave the school I knew it was too soon to come back… Then someone put their hand on my shoulder, I turned around to see Edward looking at me. It looked like he had been crying. I turned back and continued walking towards the car park. It wasn't until I got there that I realized I had been driven to school today by Leticia the maid at my house, she refused to let me drive given the state that I have been in. I stopped dead in my tracks and just dropped to my knees. I felt the same familiar hand on my shoulder. This time I didn't brush it off.

"Come on Bella, I will drive you home." His voice was so calm and it made me all tingly. I slowly stood up and followed him to his car. We sat in silence and he drove me home. I lived a 10 minute drive from school. Once Edward turned the ignition off I didn't even notice I was in that much of a daze.

"Bella can I please talk to you for a moment?" his voice sounded shaky. I looked at him and nodded my head. "Now I know that you don't have anyone else to talk to. I know Jacob was your best friend and I only know that because you are all he ever talked about. Bells you may not realize that I know a lot more about you then you think. I actually pay attention when I came over. I know that your favorite novel is Harry Potter and that you love watching 10 things I hate about you and that you chew your nails when you are nervous, you also play Last Kiss by pearl Jam when you are really upset. I notice that you look at your phone hoping for someone to text you. Bells I really care about you and I don't want to see you like this. I promised your brother that I would look after you if anything was to happen to him." Once Edward finished we were both in tears. I looked at him and I didn't know what to say to him. He placed his hand on mine then spoke again.

"Jessica and Angela want to be your friend and the rest of the guys on the team want to be there for you. Can you please try and let this work… Look at this house it is way too big for just you. Can I come in and call my parents so they don't freak out about me skipping school?"

I managed to find my voice. "Of course you can come in. And Edward thank you, you don't know how much it means to me; just to know someone is there. The house does get lonely but I can't stand to leave the house and I don't want to go into foster care." Edward just got out of the car and walked around to open my door he held out his and I was reluctant to take it but I did anyway. We walked up the steps to the door. I let us in.

"You know where the phone is. I have to go and talk to Leticia to let her know that I am home." Edward just nodded and walked to the downstairs office to use the phone I walked into the kitchen where I found Leticia. She was a very petite looking lady and she had a look of worry on her face.

"How did you get home" she said in her English accent.

"Ummm Edward drove me home, I needed to get away from school." The tears started up again. She walked up to me and hugged me tight. I knew there was something wrong with her.

"Leticia what is the matter?" She looked up at me started to cry.

"Bella I don't want to do this to you but my daughter has just had her baby and I want to go and see her in England. I don't want to leave you alone." Just then Edward was standing behind me. He spoke very calmly.

"Leticia, don't worry about it, Bella has a lot of friends now and we will all take it in turns staying with her." I looked at Edward shocked I didn't know what to say, this was the last thing I expected.


	2. Chapter 2

Before I had a chance to say anything Leticia was already speaking. "Would you do that Edward it would mean a lot to me. I will give your mum a call if you want to ask if she is ok with it." She sounded excited now. I didn't even have time to argue. I guess it didn't matter I wanted Leticia to be happy and I guess Edward isn't that bad to stay with. He has been he that many times; it might actually be nice to have someone here with me at night. My thoughts were interrupted when Edward spoke. "If you could, she won't have a problem with it, but just to keep in her good books you better ring her. How long will you be gone for?" he said. I didn't even think of this question I didn't want her to rush her visit because she is worrying about me. "I would like to stay a month but I will check in after 2 weeks to see how you are all going and if I need to come back I will." Leticia said looking kind of sad. I managed to talk this time.  
"Leticia you stay as long as you like, I will be fine, I am sure Edward will look after me. Oh and I have something for you, I decided after I went through the will of my parents that I wanted to give you something for looking after me. I handed her a check with $500,000 on it. It is for you to spend on yourself and your daughter." I said as I pulled a check out of the kitchen draw. Leticia looked at me with eyes full of tears. "Thank you so much Bella it means a lot to me." I pulled her into a hug and whispered in her ear, "you better go and pack. I will talk to you when you get there, and don't worry about me. I am not sure I am ready to go back to school but don't worry I will be ready soon. I love you." All she could say was "I Love you like my own daughter and call if you need anything." After saying that, she walked out of the kitchen. I just stood there with my eyes glued to the door.

I didn't even notice that Edward had walked up to me I was still in a zoned out state. His soft breath blew in my ear as he spoke. "Bella it is ok I will look after you. Would you like to come to my house with me so I can get some clothes?"  
I looked at him and nodded I knew that this was no time for me to be alone. I didn't want to be tempted to try and take my life again the scars have just started to close over. I knew it wasn't a good idea to stay here. I followed Edward out the door grabbing my blank Gucci bag on the way out. He held open the door for me as I hoped in. Edward lived about 15 minutes away so I turned on the stereo and the first song that came on was Flo Rider Get Low. I just burst into tears and Edward looked like he was about to as well. This was my brother's favorite song and we both knew it. Neither of us skipped the song, he just continued driving and I just stared out the window. I was zoned out when all of a sudden my message tone Get Freaky went off. Edward looked over at me. I pulled my phone out it said one new text from a number I didn't know. I flipped open my phone.  
To- Bella  
From- unknown  
Hey Bella its Angela I was just wondering do you want to hang out tonight? Xx hope to hear from you soon.  
Edward looked at me. "Who was that?" he looked as though he was in shock, that I actually got a text.  
"Ummm it was from Angela she wants to hang out tonight." I spoke getting a little nervous. No one ever wanted to hang out with me.  
"You should say yes, and then you can borrow my phone and text everyone else and we will all get dressed up and go out to dinner somewhere it would be nice to get you out of the house for a while and for everyone to show that they really want to be your friend." He spoke with a little smile.  
"Ok I guess. It might be fun." I said still not sure, but I wasn't in a position to argue with Edward.  
To- Angela  
from- Bella  
Hey thanks 4 the txt. I'm with Edward the moment & he thinks we should all go to dinner. Meet my house at 7?  
I then grabbed Edward's phone.  
To- The entire footy team and their girl friends  
From- Edward  
Hey guys it Bella, Edward is driving the moment and he wanted me 2 txt and ask if u would like 2 go 2 dinner 2night with me and him. He thinks it could be fun. If so meet my house 7.  
I put his phone down as we turned into the driveway. Edward's family was wealthy as well. I walked up the stairs and his mum opened the door she gave me a huge hug.

I just hugged her back. She smiled at me. "So Bella I hear you are borrowing my son for a while?" she said giggling.  
"Only if you don't mind. Otherwise I will be ok on my own." I say looking around the house. Watching Edward walk up the stairs to get his stuff.  
"Don't be silly Edward has been going insane wanting to help you but you were never at school and it was hard for him to go to your house. He didn't cope very well, and I guess he just wants to help you through this tough time." She spoke so calmly. "So you can keep him for as long as you need to and if you ever need anything or want a home cooked meal, don't be afraid to come over."  
I smiled at her "Thank you." I tried to fight back tears. And too my suprise I won.  
"I'm not going to school tomorrow I still don't think I am ready, but it is alright if you would prefer for Edward to go." I said thinking that there is no way Edward will let me stay home by myself.  
Her words were soft. "Hunny, Edward won't leave you by yourself and I am not going to force him to go to school. If he wants to stay with you then he can. I trust that you will be back to school sooner or later." I just smiled at her. Edward came down the stairs and gave his mum a kiss and a hug. "I love you mum." He said in a super cute voice.  
"I love you to Edward, You too Bella." She said as she waved goodbye to us as we pulled out of the drive way.  
I checked my phone. 6 new messages. WHOA i thought to myself.  
I looked at Edward. "who have you given my number too?" He looked at me and giggled.  
"Everyone" I just glared at him. Then scanned through the messages. All of them were from people saying that they were coming tonight. I saved everyone's numbers.  
"So where do you want to go tonight?" I said to him as we were driving.  
"It doesn't worry me… you pick." After he spoke I picked my phone up and rang my favorite restaurant Le Chefs.  
"Hi it's Isabella Swan and I was wondering can I book the function room tonight for 7?" The lady on the phone fussed and said that it was all on the house and that she was happy that she would get to see me again. We used to be regulars there.  
"All booked, and a Limo will pick us up at 7." I spoke nice and calm and was starting to get excited.  
"Why do we need a Limo?" he asked shocked.  
"Because your not allowed to drink and drive." I spoke quietly.  
He was in shock. "But we are under age we are not allowed to drink at the restaurant."  
"Edward that is why we are in the function room. As long as we don't drive we are allowed to drink. My parents bought the function room, it is like our own private property." I giggled.  
"Wow Bella you sure know how to get away with alot." He pulled into our garage and we walked through the house. I turned around to face him. " I have to go and have a shower and get ready since I only have an hour to get ready, but I know this will be hard you are allowed to sleep in Jacobs room if you want. Otherwise you can sleep downstairs in the spare room." He looked at me in shock.  
"I want to be close to you so I will sleep in Jacob's room." After he spoke I climbed the stairs and walked into my bathroom.

I jumped into the shower where I washed my hair it is shoulder length and brown it is naturally wavy. I then shaved my legs and hopped out. I wrapped a towel around me and then started to do my hair. I switched on my GHD and blow dried my hair and then straightened it. It always looked nice when it was straight. I guess it really shined. I applied my makeup. I always wear dark eyeliner and mascara because it makes the blue in my eyes stand out. But its not like anyone noticed. I put on some silver eye shadow and walked to my cupboard. I looked at the time and it was just about 7 I could hear voices downstairs. I opened my massive walk in wardrobe and I walked the section that had all my nice clothes in it. I actually had alot of nice stuff but never wore it because there was no one to show off to. I decided that tonight would be different, that they are all here for me. I pulled out a sparkly black strapless dress. I sat just above my knees. I had quite a busty chest so the dress stayed up without a hassle. It clung to all the right curves. I put on a pair of black strappy heels and looked at myself in the mirror. I was shocked I didn't recognize the girl looking back at me. I grabbed my clutch bag, put my money and my phone in it with some lipgloss and I walked out the door. I walked to the top of the stairs and there were 8 people standing there looking at me. All of their jaws hit the ground when I walked down the stairs. I couldn't help but smile. As I reached the bottom, Angela spoke. "My god Bella you have boobs!" she started to giggle.  
"Thanks Angela." But I always have, I just choose not to show them off. "Alright you can all stop starring at me now, lets go we are already late." I spoke as I held the door opened. Edward hung back with me as I locked the door. He leant over and whispered in my ear, "You look amazing." My heart fluttered. I looked him up and down and wow he was gorgeous, he was wearing a black tux his blonde hair falling on his shoulders and his blue eyes glinting in the moon light. This cannot be happening am I developing feelings for Edward???


	3. Chapter 3

I shook it off and walked to the limo. We just all talked about little bits and pieces. Nothing too stressful. Edward sat next to me just starring at me. There was something about his gaze that just made me want to hug him. We finally pulled up into the restaurant car park. We all got out of the car and made our way in. The lady at the front desk hugged me tightly and then showed us into the room. "A waiter will be in to take your drink orders in a minute." Then she turned on her heel and walked out. Everyone took a seat and I sat in between Edward and Angela. The waiter came in. "Ahhh Miss Swan its good to see you. What will you be having tonight?" he spoke to me.  
"A Cosmo please." I spoke and everyone looked at me.  
Mike spoke. "Bella we are too young to be drinking here." He looked confused. I just looked at them and said "it's ok we are allowed to drink here, and you are all welcome to stay at my house tonight so you aren't driving home." Everyone looked confused but they all placed an order and then the waiter came back with the drinks. I sipped my Cosmo and started to talk to people. Everyone was having a good time including myself. I skulled the rest of my Cosmo and then the waiter came back with a new drink for all of us and took our food orders. Once our food arrived we all ate. I finished first and excused myself so I could go to the bathroom. I went to the toilet and stood and fixed my hair in the mirror. Then Angela and Jessica appeared. "Hey" they both said in unison.  
"Hi, what's up?" I said looking over at them.  
Jessica spoke, "Do you like Edward?" this took me by surprise and I just starred at them.  
"What makes you ask that?" they looked at each other and then back at me. "Well he likes you and we just don't want to see him get hurt." Jessica said. This shocked me even more.  
"Umm well I think I might, but I don't want to get myself into anything at the moment, not until I am all sorted out." They looked at me and agreed.  
"So do you want to join the cheer squad?" Jessica asked.  
"I don't think I could do it… I am not good enough." I said  
"Bella when you come back to school you will on the squad we want you on the team. " Jessica spoke and I started to zone out. OMG they actually want to be around me.  
"I guess I don't have a choice then do I?" I said smiling at them. "Lets go I need another drink.  
We walked out giggling to each other and I took my seat next to Edward he just smiled at me. WOW his smile is gorgeous. I could feel my heart miss a beat. I drank my whole Cosmo in 2 mouthfuls. I stood up and I was a little bit wobbly it was my 5th drink after all. I announced. "I am ready to go home." No one argued with me they just got up and followed. I thanked the waiter and the host and got in the limo. It was a 10 minute drive home so I let my head fall on Edward's shoulder. Everyone decided that they would stay the night. So Edward found the boys some clothes and I took Jessica and Angela to my room to get them some PJ's.  
"HOLY SHIT Bella look at your clothes." Jessica screamed.  
"Help yourself to what ever you want to wear." I spoke as I pulled off my dress and pulled on my white short shorts and a singlet. The girls followed by getting dressed and we walked downstairs. Edward was staring at me and I got all tingly. He spoke.  
"Ok so Jessica and Mike you can sleep in Jacob's room, Angela and Eric you can have the guest room down here, Tyler, Quil and Embry you are all in the spare room upstairs."  
"So where are you sleeping?" Eric asked. It was the same question I was thinking.  
"I am going to talk to Bella for a bit and then I will sleep on the couch." Everyone said good night and Edward and I walked upstairs to my room.

I walked in and sat on the bed my head slightly spinning from drinking too quickly. Edward came in and closed the door and sat on my bed with me. I looked into his blue eyes and my heart sped up. "Bella I need to tell you something." His voice was shaky.  
"Go ahead" I replied still looking into his eyes.  
"I don't know how this is going to sound but I am just going to say it anyway. Please don't freak out. But I really like you. And I want to be your shoulder to cry on. I miss your brother like crazy but being with you kind of makes it a little bit better, it makes me feel like I am still with him. Bella I have liked you for ages and Jacob knew that, he tried to encourage me to talk to you but I never could, I didn't want it to be uncomfortable for you or him. But now that he is gone I feel that he would be upset if I didn't ask to be with you. While he spoke tears ran down my face. I started to shake. "So Isabella Swan will you be my girlfriend?" He looked away from me.  
I continued to stare at him. "I have never even had friends little own a Boyfriend, I don't know how to act or how to be, and this is all new to me. But I think Jacob would like it so I will give it a go." I said shaky. He looked at me in shock.  
"Really?" I don't think he believed my answer.  
"Yes really but you have to understand that this is all new to me so we have to take it slow."  
He leaned his body forward and wrapped his warm arms around me. I melted away; it felt like nothing else mattered. It felt like we were one person. We sat there for almost half an hour until he put his hands on my face and lifted my chin to his. His lips met mine they were so soft and warm. He kissed me softly. Then pulled his head away. "So am I allowed to cuddle with you tonight or is that moving to quickly?" he asked softly I could feel his breath on my face.  
"I would really like for you to stay." With saying that I crawled into my queen size bed and he followed. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. I lay on my pillow snuggled into him and fell to sleep quickly. Although I swore I heard him say something but my subconscious took over and I fell into a deep sleep.

"AWWWWWWWWW how sweet" I opened my eyes and I was awoken by a group of people standing in my door way looking at me. I couldn't figure out why and then I felt Edward move behind me. I sat up and threw a pillow at them. "Get out… I will be out soon."  
"But Bella, Angela and I just want to borrow clothes for school. Are you coming to school today?" Jessica spoke while she was grinning from ear to ear. I was about to speak when I heard Edward groan beside me.  
"Of course she is, even if it's just for the morning. We have Jacob's memorial service today before lunch." He spoke as he got out of bed slowly and walked to the door. I had forgotten about today but I thought to myself I might actually make it through this with my new group of friends. Edward turned around once he reached the door. "Angela, Jessica, make sure you pick her clothes to make her stand out, today is all about Bella." He winked at me and then left with the boys.  
The girls closed the door and ran over to me. "So spill" Jessica said. I told them what he said and they awed and then they dragged me to the closet. "We are going to make you look so hot Edward won't know what hit him." Angela said giggling.  
They made me try on heaps of outfits until they both screamed and agreed that this was the one. I was wearing frilly black mini skirt that had pink patches on it, with a pink boob tube accompanied by a black shawl. They threw me a pair of small black heels and then dragged me into the bathroom. Jessica curled my hair while Angela did my makeup. I stood up and they both screamed. They both put on a pair of my skinny jeans and a singlet each they did their hair and makeup and we left the room. They both looped their arms with mine and walked me down the stairs.


End file.
